YOU already know

I don't know how many times I've asked God "What is my calling?" and ever since the tenth-or-so time I've had this feeling in my heart telling me "You already know, follow your passion." And I know that it's God but then doubt comes into my heart and gets me thinking "What if it isn't?" It's a scary thought, to me at least. But then, I guess it's just part of something that i have to give to Him, something that can totally ruin my life if it isn't dealt with and the only one who can cure me is God. I've been stuck in a round-about and I don't know which exit to take, and doubt has been eating away at me, making me not decide. I need to give it to God because it's something difficult for me and I'm fed up with it to the point of exploding. I can't describe well how it really makes me feel, but... I just don't want it anymore. It's painful, heartbreaking and it disconnects me from God and I loathe it with a very sincere passion. To follow him means to give something(s) up. I gladly give this doubt to you O Ford, my Father and God because you love me and will never leave me and can take anything worthless that hurts me and replaces what needs to be replaced. I love you, Father.